Monday, August 31, 2015

A Funny Moment with my Vibrator

A vibrating moment

If women were more honest, the accessory called a vibrator would not cause such embarrassment. We all know that men wank, but how many of us would own up to being the proud owner of a vibrator? I have had one (not the same one of course) from before South Africa became “verlig” and started importing sex toys and aids. But back in the day when sex was a dirty word and Noddy was still banned, I had my fair share of hilarious moments.

My vibrator had its own place in my handbag, so it went everywhere with me. One never knows when you need to sort out a little bit of horniness. It can even happen during the time it takes for the traffic lights to turn from red to green.

I was buying a printer from Macro, a large supermarket/wholesaler. A really lovely young man was helping me. He put the printer down on the glass top counter while he processed the sale. I put my handbag down on the counter as well. Suddenly I heard a vibrating sound and to my complete embarrassment, found the source of the noise in my handbag. By then not only was the salesman looking on with curiosity, but so was his colleague. With one hand I tried to scratch around in the (large and deep) bag for the offending noise producing item to switch it off. It had one of those tops that you screw down at the back to activate and to stop it you unscrew the lid a little. Obviously from all the banging the bag had done against my leg, the bottom of the vibrator had screwed itself a little tighter and it had turned itself on. The material handbag and the vibrating vibrator on the glass top counter made a loud enough noise for other colleagues to lean in closer to the noise. There was nothing for it but to open my bag and start unloading it in an attempt to silence that offending vibrator.

“Sorry fellows, but my vibrator has turned itself on”, I said when I eventually got the offending article out the bag and onto the counter. I was so peeved about it that I actually opened it properly and dropped the three AAA batteries into my bag, put the lid back onto the vibrator and dropped that too into my bag. The Macro salesmen’s eyes were as round as saucers.

After paying for the printer, I had three salespeople fighting to carry it to my car. I doubt whether those three young men will ever forget the day a woman removed the batteries from her vibrator on their glass topped counter. Vibrators also improve the after sales service of the salesmen!